What should I write? I'm bored. That's practically the sole reason I have
Kuis 1: Bahasa
5 years ago
Monday, July 5, 2010
Black-White
What should I write? I'm bored. That's practically the sole reason why I'm writing this.
It's Youth Day. Yeah, right.
When they say it's a day for celebrating your youth, they don't mean you can go to the park and ride a bike or skating, or go to the mall to hang out without a care.
Youth Day means a reason for teachers to give extra work and confine the kids to their study room and left them to stare longingly for the outdoor sunshine. How ecstatic and youthful.
Next week will be a hectic one for me, I guess.
So despite all my loath for studying, I just can't help but getting a restraining jacket for the youthful burst to calm down and start memorizing these Biology stuffs.
I develop a pet peeve, too. Can't say it's just born recently. It's there since long, it's just nowadays it's been mutating like some cancer cells.
I don't like those with no manner.
Those who whine about hearts and stuffs, but somehow unable of being considerate even for small things, at least to say 'please' or give a friendly look instead of mood breaking glares or keep pointing the most obvious thing of all things just to show they have some basic brain cells.
Maybe it's me being too demanding or observing, but enough is enough. Through this entry I'm saying it. I. do. notice.
Subconscious and subtle things irked me more than the facades purposely shown. If they say humans must have subjective opinion of others no matter how they deny it, than this is my way to make one.
But things being things, I'm not everybody's mom so I can't just bark out advices. Shutting down social links isn't an option either.
I just hope my receptive cells are more flexible than I thought so I can lead a sane life. Wish me luck.
This crosses my mind as soon as I finished my last paragraph. Anybody feel offended?
In all my honesty , I do hope some can feel 'oh, this is quite like me' and try to adjust some little things for the better. But I know most that did may just hold grudges against me.
That's why, might as well declare now that this post is not meant to attack anybody. I'm just sharing some thoughts, you know that's why most blogs are made. And thoughts, as we live in the maze (or mess) of relationships, not seldom it'll automatically involve some other conscious beings. No hard feelings, kay?
Eh, I'm serious. Feel free to let me know if you, my dear few readers have something in mind. The comment space and the chat box are not just some random wallflower, y'know.
It's Youth Day. Yeah, right.
When they say it's a day for celebrating your youth, they don't mean you can go to the park and ride a bike or skating, or go to the mall to hang out without a care.
Youth Day means a reason for teachers to give extra work and confine the kids to their study room and left them to stare longingly for the outdoor sunshine. How ecstatic and youthful.
Next week will be a hectic one for me, I guess.
So despite all my loath for studying, I just can't help but getting a restraining jacket for the youthful burst to calm down and start memorizing these Biology stuffs.
I develop a pet peeve, too. Can't say it's just born recently. It's there since long, it's just nowadays it's been mutating like some cancer cells.
I don't like those with no manner.
Those who whine about hearts and stuffs, but somehow unable of being considerate even for small things, at least to say 'please' or give a friendly look instead of mood breaking glares or keep pointing the most obvious thing of all things just to show they have some basic brain cells.
Maybe it's me being too demanding or observing, but enough is enough. Through this entry I'm saying it. I. do. notice.
Subconscious and subtle things irked me more than the facades purposely shown. If they say humans must have subjective opinion of others no matter how they deny it, than this is my way to make one.
But things being things, I'm not everybody's mom so I can't just bark out advices. Shutting down social links isn't an option either.
I just hope my receptive cells are more flexible than I thought so I can lead a sane life. Wish me luck.
This crosses my mind as soon as I finished my last paragraph. Anybody feel offended?
In all my honesty , I do hope some can feel 'oh, this is quite like me' and try to adjust some little things for the better. But I know most that did may just hold grudges against me.
That's why, might as well declare now that this post is not meant to attack anybody. I'm just sharing some thoughts, you know that's why most blogs are made. And thoughts, as we live in the maze (or mess) of relationships, not seldom it'll automatically involve some other conscious beings. No hard feelings, kay?
Eh, I'm serious. Feel free to let me know if you, my dear few readers have something in mind. The comment space and the chat box are not just some random wallflower, y'know.
Thursday, May 20, 2010
Days and Nights
Oh, it's already mid-year. I haven't made a post since.. long, I guess.
Ok, I'll make a post in Indonesian. Happy now?
Sbulan ini sibuk. Kayaknya di jurnal gw yg manapun, tuh kalimat pasti nongol.
Ujian, maraton (a.k.a. teror tahunan), bejibun kerjaan ekskul, dsb, dsb, dsb, you name it.. Minggu ini, udah kaya last lap klo di pacuan kuda mah. Tapi tetep we ada beberapa ulangan dan tugas yang dengan sesuatu cara berhasil diselip- selip in sama guru.
Geez, GIVE ME A BREAK, FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE!
Libur mid-year, thankfully, bakal dateng bentar lagi.
Tapi kaya biasa, kiasu-ness ensues~ dan serangan kata2 'jangan lupa belajar' ga berhenti juga, bahkan sebelum gw sempet berpikir tentang apa yang bakal gw lakuin waktu libur. Bahkan ada yang wanti2 jangan sampe gw makin lancar ngomong mother tongue gw sendiri.
"Mendidik murid untuk berkembang, dan setia pada komitmen dan negara"? What a joke. Or is it my fault to have some sense of nationalism?
Anyway.
Hari ini samsak samsak gw pada berani membuang nyawa dengan datang ke pulau kecil ini, dan besok gw bakal ketemu mereka. Good timing. Gw lagi pengen menyalurkan energi. No offense, tapi 'no harm to women' itu salah satu lifetime policy/principle gw. Berbahagialah mereka yang status gendernya bersimbol Venus, practically almost all living beings I spend my daily life with.
Rasanya weekend ini bakal rame. Mungkin. Probably.
Tapi berarti sekarang gw kudu nyicil buat Senen juga. Sumhow guru- guru nyelipin dua biji ulangan di situ. Clever. But that, will not stop me.
Apakah gw sedang stres? Mungkin, dengan meningkatnya frekuensi bersih bersih gw (what the freak.. klo stres malah bersih bersih..).
Seminggu lagi. Sabar.
Ok, I'll make a post in Indonesian. Happy now?
Sbulan ini sibuk. Kayaknya di jurnal gw yg manapun, tuh kalimat pasti nongol.
Ujian, maraton (a.k.a. teror tahunan), bejibun kerjaan ekskul, dsb, dsb, dsb, you name it.. Minggu ini, udah kaya last lap klo di pacuan kuda mah. Tapi tetep we ada beberapa ulangan dan tugas yang dengan sesuatu cara berhasil diselip- selip in sama guru.
Geez, GIVE ME A BREAK, FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE!
Libur mid-year, thankfully, bakal dateng bentar lagi.
Tapi kaya biasa, kiasu-ness ensues~ dan serangan kata2 'jangan lupa belajar' ga berhenti juga, bahkan sebelum gw sempet berpikir tentang apa yang bakal gw lakuin waktu libur. Bahkan ada yang wanti2 jangan sampe gw makin lancar ngomong mother tongue gw sendiri.
"Mendidik murid untuk berkembang, dan setia pada komitmen dan negara"? What a joke. Or is it my fault to have some sense of nationalism?
Anyway.
Hari ini samsak samsak gw pada berani membuang nyawa dengan datang ke pulau kecil ini, dan besok gw bakal ketemu mereka. Good timing. Gw lagi pengen menyalurkan energi. No offense, tapi 'no harm to women' itu salah satu lifetime policy/principle gw. Berbahagialah mereka yang status gendernya bersimbol Venus, practically almost all living beings I spend my daily life with.
Rasanya weekend ini bakal rame. Mungkin. Probably.
Tapi berarti sekarang gw kudu nyicil buat Senen juga. Sumhow guru- guru nyelipin dua biji ulangan di situ. Clever. But that, will not stop me.
Apakah gw sedang stres? Mungkin, dengan meningkatnya frekuensi bersih bersih gw (what the freak.. klo stres malah bersih bersih..).
Seminggu lagi. Sabar.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
Back to Reality
Had a nice lunch today. It was satisfying~
Now back to reality. Math, Physics, Bio and Geog?
Will I be able to finish them all by today?
I'm listening to a nice piano song.
A song that I'm practicing myself.
I want to practice my no-good-playing too.
Can I?
Now back to reality. Math, Physics, Bio and Geog?
Will I be able to finish them all by today?
I'm listening to a nice piano song.
A song that I'm practicing myself.
I want to practice my no-good-playing too.
Can I?
Tuesday, March 16, 2010
Whistle on The Wind
Greetings,
Holiday! Day off's! Rest? Not really.
Well, it's useless to be wimpy and start ranting. Not to mention it's also annoying.
"Gotta live your life.
You may be alive. You may have a life. But you might not living the life."
See the difference?
I'm in no mood to have a long strings of text.. yet. Maybe I'll talk about in sometime. But not now. I'm fully aware that my stamina is limited, and need to be conserved for tomorrow.
Oh, but I had an interesting short story.
So, it was already quite late, and I was finishing my weekly laundry routine. I was sleepy, and some rain-drenched clothes were kinda stinky, and so it was not a really pleasant mood I had.
The next thing I know, a couple of guys were mumbling in.. German (maybe? or another European language) in front of a drying machine.
(o_O) ...I thought I'm staying in an all-girls boarding school...
It turns out that they are some guests from overseas. Maybe there're some announcements about them, some announcement I didn't manage to hear, and thus we stared at each other for about 5 seconds or so before they finally asked for help with two priceless expressions.
(^^) LOL.
Life never cease to surprise me, indeed.
Good night,
aurell4173
Holiday! Day off's! Rest? Not really.
Well, it's useless to be wimpy and start ranting. Not to mention it's also annoying.
"Gotta live your life.
You may be alive. You may have a life. But you might not living the life."
See the difference?
I'm in no mood to have a long strings of text.. yet. Maybe I'll talk about in sometime. But not now. I'm fully aware that my stamina is limited, and need to be conserved for tomorrow.
Oh, but I had an interesting short story.
So, it was already quite late, and I was finishing my weekly laundry routine. I was sleepy, and some rain-drenched clothes were kinda stinky, and so it was not a really pleasant mood I had.
The next thing I know, a couple of guys were mumbling in.. German (maybe? or another European language) in front of a drying machine.
(o_O) ...I thought I'm staying in an all-girls boarding school...
It turns out that they are some guests from overseas. Maybe there're some announcements about them, some announcement I didn't manage to hear, and thus we stared at each other for about 5 seconds or so before they finally asked for help with two priceless expressions.
(^^) LOL.
Life never cease to surprise me, indeed.
Good night,
aurell4173
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
My Wish
Coz' of the influence I got from "5 cm", for once, I want to use Indonesian.
Ok, jadi banyak yg terjadi belakangan. Sala satunya, minggu kmaren. Entah stelah berapa lama, saia tanding olah raga lagi. Tanding. Match! Bukan tes ato ujian skolah.
Tes tetep rame. Apalagi skrg yang lagi dimaenin tenis. THE tenis. THE sports yang serasa long lost love, tragic type buat gw personally. Buat 3 bulan terakhir ini, PE lessons adalah surga kecil diantara pelajaran laennya.
Tapi matches.. itu beda.
"The most painful thing of a moment is when you can't do anything for what is going on in front of your eyes."
Dan setelah beberapa waktu, sempet lupa tu feeling.
Minggu kmaren, setelah memutuskan buat maen against my better logic as a first-aider, gw serasa org yg jantung kanannya idup lagi (ato mirip2 gitu dhe, meski gw cuma punya satu jantung di sebelah kiri sih). Dengan anehnya dan ajaibnya, gw terharu.
Prtandingan2 yang gw maenin, DAN pertandingan yang ga gw maenin, in the end smuanya tumplek jadi satu. Entah gmn, beberapa hal yang ada di pikiran gw, tiba2 jadi jernih.
Waktu smuanya udh beres, mendadak gw sadar klo gw terharu. Dan gw pun menangis. Dengan lebih dari satu alasan.
Bukan cuma karena kita sempet kalah.
Bukan cuma karena kita sempet menang.
Bukan cuma karena gw ga maen.
Bukan cuma karena gw sempet maen banyak.
Bukan cuma karena smuanya bentar lagi beres.
Bukan cuma karena smua team mates dan supporters ngerubung jadi satu.
Bukan cuma karena team lawan pun ikutan ngerubung.
Bukan cuma karena gw bersyukur kaki gw masi bisa efektif dipake.
Bukan cuma karena gw ga nyesel sama skali udh mutusin buat maen.
Bukan cuma karena di dlm matches itu gw diem2 mutusin banyak hal2 yang jadi pikiran belakangan.
Bukan cuma karena gw senang atas keputusan yang gw ambil.
Bukan cuma karena gw sedih sama keputusan yang gw ambil.
Tapi campuran dari semuanya, baik yang ketulis di atas maupun nggak.
Ga ada hubungannya sama pamor, imej, sgala detil2 ga penting yang banyak dibikin alasan. Feeling waktu lagi maen di tengah2 lapangan itu bner2 beda. Gw yakin klo ini mau dijabarin juga gw bisa bikin esai yang jauh lebih panjang dari Geog AA. Dan feeling macem itu lah yang bisa ngajarin mental seseorg lebih dari nasehat2 klise ato teori macem2. Referensi ke "5 cm", contohnya kayak berhasil manjat gunung Mahameru bisa ngubah nasib dan gaya hidup seseorang drastis. Self-experience emg beda. Gw ngerti klo yg baca ini spontan komentar klo ini lebay ato sok-dramatis. Tapi, well.. self-experience emg beda.
Yang pasti, setelah post-match period yang bner2 anti-climatic karena mendadak datar dan boring dan tidak produktif, skrg pikiran gw mulai jernih, smoga.
Udh pernah gw tulis di post2 sebelomnya. Tujuan idup gw kurang lebih termasuk jadi org yang gw sendiri bakal suka. Gw ga mau nyeselin apapun yang udh gw lakuin, ato gw ucapin, pengennya sih. Bukan berarti gw ga akan pernah ngaku salah, jauh dari itu. Cuma.. gw ga mau ngabis2in waktu gw buat muter2 menangisi nasib. Waktu idup terlalu terbatas buat itu, sudah terbuktikan dgn pengalaman.
Minggu kmaren.. is really the feeling of being alive. Gw ga mau lupa lagi.
Tapi gw juga ga mau trus tenggelem di situ. Ato gw bakal nyesel ntarnya.
So, it's time to move on. Beresin hal2 yang ngeganjal di kepala. Trus kita maju lagi. Idup itu emg enaknya gitu, kayaknya.
Good night,
Ok, jadi banyak yg terjadi belakangan. Sala satunya, minggu kmaren. Entah stelah berapa lama, saia tanding olah raga lagi. Tanding. Match! Bukan tes ato ujian skolah.
Tes tetep rame. Apalagi skrg yang lagi dimaenin tenis. THE tenis. THE sports yang serasa long lost love, tragic type buat gw personally. Buat 3 bulan terakhir ini, PE lessons adalah surga kecil diantara pelajaran laennya.
Tapi matches.. itu beda.
"The most painful thing of a moment is when you can't do anything for what is going on in front of your eyes."
Dan setelah beberapa waktu, sempet lupa tu feeling.
Minggu kmaren, setelah memutuskan buat maen against my better logic as a first-aider, gw serasa org yg jantung kanannya idup lagi (ato mirip2 gitu dhe, meski gw cuma punya satu jantung di sebelah kiri sih). Dengan anehnya dan ajaibnya, gw terharu.
Prtandingan2 yang gw maenin, DAN pertandingan yang ga gw maenin, in the end smuanya tumplek jadi satu. Entah gmn, beberapa hal yang ada di pikiran gw, tiba2 jadi jernih.
Waktu smuanya udh beres, mendadak gw sadar klo gw terharu. Dan gw pun menangis. Dengan lebih dari satu alasan.
Bukan cuma karena kita sempet kalah.
Bukan cuma karena kita sempet menang.
Bukan cuma karena gw ga maen.
Bukan cuma karena gw sempet maen banyak.
Bukan cuma karena smuanya bentar lagi beres.
Bukan cuma karena smua team mates dan supporters ngerubung jadi satu.
Bukan cuma karena team lawan pun ikutan ngerubung.
Bukan cuma karena gw bersyukur kaki gw masi bisa efektif dipake.
Bukan cuma karena gw ga nyesel sama skali udh mutusin buat maen.
Bukan cuma karena di dlm matches itu gw diem2 mutusin banyak hal2 yang jadi pikiran belakangan.
Bukan cuma karena gw senang atas keputusan yang gw ambil.
Bukan cuma karena gw sedih sama keputusan yang gw ambil.
Tapi campuran dari semuanya, baik yang ketulis di atas maupun nggak.
Ga ada hubungannya sama pamor, imej, sgala detil2 ga penting yang banyak dibikin alasan. Feeling waktu lagi maen di tengah2 lapangan itu bner2 beda. Gw yakin klo ini mau dijabarin juga gw bisa bikin esai yang jauh lebih panjang dari Geog AA. Dan feeling macem itu lah yang bisa ngajarin mental seseorg lebih dari nasehat2 klise ato teori macem2. Referensi ke "5 cm", contohnya kayak berhasil manjat gunung Mahameru bisa ngubah nasib dan gaya hidup seseorang drastis. Self-experience emg beda. Gw ngerti klo yg baca ini spontan komentar klo ini lebay ato sok-dramatis. Tapi, well.. self-experience emg beda.
Yang pasti, setelah post-match period yang bner2 anti-climatic karena mendadak datar dan boring dan tidak produktif, skrg pikiran gw mulai jernih, smoga.
Udh pernah gw tulis di post2 sebelomnya. Tujuan idup gw kurang lebih termasuk jadi org yang gw sendiri bakal suka. Gw ga mau nyeselin apapun yang udh gw lakuin, ato gw ucapin, pengennya sih. Bukan berarti gw ga akan pernah ngaku salah, jauh dari itu. Cuma.. gw ga mau ngabis2in waktu gw buat muter2 menangisi nasib. Waktu idup terlalu terbatas buat itu, sudah terbuktikan dgn pengalaman.
Minggu kmaren.. is really the feeling of being alive. Gw ga mau lupa lagi.
Tapi gw juga ga mau trus tenggelem di situ. Ato gw bakal nyesel ntarnya.
So, it's time to move on. Beresin hal2 yang ngeganjal di kepala. Trus kita maju lagi. Idup itu emg enaknya gitu, kayaknya.
Good night,
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Dreams that I hope would remain as dreams - II
Hi, good afternoon.
I woke up late today. Oh don't' worry, it's a day off after all.
But somehow, I'm reminded by the dreams I 've had last year.
The continuation of the previous one.
Day 2
A white painted, small, rusty, old building. It was cramped and poorly built with a strange structure. It had four levels, each consisted of two or three rooms, with up to five or six residents, all cramped up, lying beside one another when it's time to sleep. The staircases connected each levels were made of wood. Several teenagers (approx. 4), came to the house, visiting some older friends who lived in the fourth level. They put their shoes outside the small room, near the edge of the wooden stairs. The room was just like the others. Rectangular with white cement wall, which was cracked in several spots. There were several things and furniture around the room which made it looked like an apartment or living space. There was one big windows, which led to a small veranda with thin iron bars as the rails. NO city light can be seen from the veranda. Only a dark town with no sign of life and the sky.
It was night time, with dark sky. Among the teenagers, one was feeling rather uncomfortable. There were a strange, bizarre chill feeling that she got. There was wind, cold wind. But instead of refreshing, it was kinda sickening, giving her a creepy feeling. Her friends were just chatting, enjoyed the time in the cramped room. Then she felt the wind from outside the windows was felt too chill and bizarre. She climbed out through the window to the veranda, and looked at the sky. Then, all sound were off. A complete silent for her. There was holes in the sky. A black one, darker than the night around it. In a creepy sense, smog or line of aurora in slime green and dark violet colour were circling the hole, like a black hole. There was another smaller hole beside the first one, also a dark one. The sky and the cloud was like affected by the hole, making patterns like it's being absorbed slowly to the hole. Those chilly wind blow came from both holes. The teenager stood for a while, completely mesmerized. Then she, in horror, called her friends. They were shocked, too. Then the wind got stronger. The older peers, quickly suggested for them to run. They rushed out from the room, racing down the wooden stairs, telling people in every level to come out and run. The feeling was completely bizarre, everyone's heart was racing. They all run as for they lives out and away from the building, that are threatened to fell off, raining them with wood and cement pieces. By the time they managed to got out from the building, it collapsed, and was absorbed to the hole. Strangely, other buildings which seemed to rather lifeless in that slum like area was being absorbed rather slower. All people ran away, they did not dare to turn back.
There. Copy-pasted as it is from my last year's journal. It's not that I like this type of dream. It's just that I don't wanna forget them. They were ones of a few who gave me strong emotions last year, in terms of fear.
Good day,
aurell4173
I woke up late today. Oh don't' worry, it's a day off after all.
But somehow, I'm reminded by the dreams I 've had last year.
The continuation of the previous one.
Day 2
A white painted, small, rusty, old building. It was cramped and poorly built with a strange structure. It had four levels, each consisted of two or three rooms, with up to five or six residents, all cramped up, lying beside one another when it's time to sleep. The staircases connected each levels were made of wood. Several teenagers (approx. 4), came to the house, visiting some older friends who lived in the fourth level. They put their shoes outside the small room, near the edge of the wooden stairs. The room was just like the others. Rectangular with white cement wall, which was cracked in several spots. There were several things and furniture around the room which made it looked like an apartment or living space. There was one big windows, which led to a small veranda with thin iron bars as the rails. NO city light can be seen from the veranda. Only a dark town with no sign of life and the sky.
It was night time, with dark sky. Among the teenagers, one was feeling rather uncomfortable. There were a strange, bizarre chill feeling that she got. There was wind, cold wind. But instead of refreshing, it was kinda sickening, giving her a creepy feeling. Her friends were just chatting, enjoyed the time in the cramped room. Then she felt the wind from outside the windows was felt too chill and bizarre. She climbed out through the window to the veranda, and looked at the sky. Then, all sound were off. A complete silent for her. There was holes in the sky. A black one, darker than the night around it. In a creepy sense, smog or line of aurora in slime green and dark violet colour were circling the hole, like a black hole. There was another smaller hole beside the first one, also a dark one. The sky and the cloud was like affected by the hole, making patterns like it's being absorbed slowly to the hole. Those chilly wind blow came from both holes. The teenager stood for a while, completely mesmerized. Then she, in horror, called her friends. They were shocked, too. Then the wind got stronger. The older peers, quickly suggested for them to run. They rushed out from the room, racing down the wooden stairs, telling people in every level to come out and run. The feeling was completely bizarre, everyone's heart was racing. They all run as for they lives out and away from the building, that are threatened to fell off, raining them with wood and cement pieces. By the time they managed to got out from the building, it collapsed, and was absorbed to the hole. Strangely, other buildings which seemed to rather lifeless in that slum like area was being absorbed rather slower. All people ran away, they did not dare to turn back.
There. Copy-pasted as it is from my last year's journal. It's not that I like this type of dream. It's just that I don't wanna forget them. They were ones of a few who gave me strong emotions last year, in terms of fear.
Good day,
aurell4173
Sunday, February 7, 2010
Round and back
Hi, good afternoon.
I'm testing out Chrome on Mac today. Oh I've had it since it's out of course, but I haven't got a chance to abuse it a bit. Turns out it's kinda okay.. I love the themes. Yeah lately I've been personalizing some things, including my web browsers. I think I'm gonna use it for work related net life. But Facebook, twitter and this blog would still be in Firefox, though. The white Fender bass theme I found last week is simply too beautiful to be ignored. And I can't play any string instrument except making a C scale on few. Hm.
Anyone thinking I'm cheerful today? Well.. tough luck, people.
To put it bluntly, I'm in a state of randomness. Nothing coherent seems to be attached in my mind now, and no matter how, I can't direct all these energy to my works. Noo..
It's not that I don't want to do it, it's just if some part of my mind is unwilling, then my hands would not as good as it should be thus I would end up with no satisfaction on my part. It makes me feel terrible.
True, lately I have been tiring myself out.
So I want to do something about it. Today is a good chance to do it. Weekly rest is always be embraced. After my dose of peace, I hung out a bit to have some laugh. It was fun. After that, I had a detour to some places I had not visited for awhile. Just me and my solitude. I dressed myself in quite a "comfortably casual" way. With that and my earphones, nobody would dare (or care) to approach me and try their luck to sell some crap things, or for a better phrasing, things that don't interest me. I was at peace, looking and browsing some books and cute things, somewhat enriching self by observing things beyond what I'm allowed to see or notice at school. Ehh but there shouldn't be any worry. I'm conscious and hence willing to take care of my mental and moral health.
For me, it's one of my personal hobbies. Beside, it's good for drawing inspirations.
Then move on to my physical fatigue. I can't argue much about this one. Sleep is important. That's why I'm thinking of taking a nap now.
By the way, Chinese New Year and Valentine Day is approaching. I have some plans to execute, although it's not the groundbreaking type. Anyway. I like festive seasons. It's sucks when prices increase and places become crowded though. But at least I can do some small decorations and have some day offs. I'm thinking of decorating this blog. Should I?
Yes. (maybe) my effort to make this blog a little lighter is.. successful? Well I think my reader is not that many, oh well that's good too, I can write some more thoughts and post some experiments here, maybe.
To my (few!) readers, please have a good weekend.
aurell4173
I'm testing out Chrome on Mac today. Oh I've had it since it's out of course, but I haven't got a chance to abuse it a bit. Turns out it's kinda okay.. I love the themes. Yeah lately I've been personalizing some things, including my web browsers. I think I'm gonna use it for work related net life. But Facebook, twitter and this blog would still be in Firefox, though. The white Fender bass theme I found last week is simply too beautiful to be ignored. And I can't play any string instrument except making a C scale on few. Hm.
Anyone thinking I'm cheerful today? Well.. tough luck, people.
To put it bluntly, I'm in a state of randomness. Nothing coherent seems to be attached in my mind now, and no matter how, I can't direct all these energy to my works. Noo..
It's not that I don't want to do it, it's just if some part of my mind is unwilling, then my hands would not as good as it should be thus I would end up with no satisfaction on my part. It makes me feel terrible.
True, lately I have been tiring myself out.
So I want to do something about it. Today is a good chance to do it. Weekly rest is always be embraced. After my dose of peace, I hung out a bit to have some laugh. It was fun. After that, I had a detour to some places I had not visited for awhile. Just me and my solitude. I dressed myself in quite a "comfortably casual" way. With that and my earphones, nobody would dare (or care) to approach me and try their luck to sell some crap things, or for a better phrasing, things that don't interest me. I was at peace, looking and browsing some books and cute things, somewhat enriching self by observing things beyond what I'm allowed to see or notice at school. Ehh but there shouldn't be any worry. I'm conscious and hence willing to take care of my mental and moral health.
For me, it's one of my personal hobbies. Beside, it's good for drawing inspirations.
Then move on to my physical fatigue. I can't argue much about this one. Sleep is important. That's why I'm thinking of taking a nap now.
By the way, Chinese New Year and Valentine Day is approaching. I have some plans to execute, although it's not the groundbreaking type. Anyway. I like festive seasons. It's sucks when prices increase and places become crowded though. But at least I can do some small decorations and have some day offs. I'm thinking of decorating this blog. Should I?
Yes. (maybe) my effort to make this blog a little lighter is.. successful? Well I think my reader is not that many, oh well that's good too, I can write some more thoughts and post some experiments here, maybe.
To my (few!) readers, please have a good weekend.
aurell4173
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Innocent World
Good evening,
Anyone who read my twitter now would read that I've decided to practically ignore someone.
I
Anyone who read my twitter now would read that I've decided to practically ignore someone.
I
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Shallow Sleep
I still want to write something light.
I need sleep. I really do. Something "big" came yesterday, something that requires me to effectively manage my time and leave some space in my mind to generate some ideas.
It's not related to school, though. That's why I'm kinda, excited.
Letting something out, I think that's a good thing, sometimes.
Lately, I've been organizing my mind. I don't want those draggy draggy feeling of annoyance. I need something to distract me away. In these limited free time, what's more effective than music?
Therefore, I'm officially addicted to music.
Once in a blue moon, I'll share something. This is one song that I think is very beautiful, even though it's practically unknown to most people, I think.
Anyone like it? Do tell. Or ask about anything.
As for myself, I like music very, very much. I think I'll post more music in this blog. It somehow tells my emotion or mood more effectively than my confusing (?) words.
To those who commented, I thank you.
Have a good night,
aurell4173
I need sleep. I really do. Something "big" came yesterday, something that requires me to effectively manage my time and leave some space in my mind to generate some ideas.
It's not related to school, though. That's why I'm kinda, excited.
Letting something out, I think that's a good thing, sometimes.
Lately, I've been organizing my mind. I don't want those draggy draggy feeling of annoyance. I need something to distract me away. In these limited free time, what's more effective than music?
Therefore, I'm officially addicted to music.
Once in a blue moon, I'll share something. This is one song that I think is very beautiful, even though it's practically unknown to most people, I think.
Anyone like it? Do tell. Or ask about anything.
As for myself, I like music very, very much. I think I'll post more music in this blog. It somehow tells my emotion or mood more effectively than my confusing (?) words.
To those who commented, I thank you.
Have a good night,
aurell4173
Sunday, January 24, 2010
-interlude- Realisation
It's one thirty in the morning and I'm still awake, haven't made present for the birthday girls, and have a mental note to wake up early tomorro... a few hours later.
...spare me. *sigh
And I realised that, my blog entries are SUPER long..!!! @.@ I've read some people's blogs, and even the most talkactive ones don't have blog entries as long as... these!
Oh, wow. That's the lightest (coz it's the shortest) entry I ever wrote. But it's just an interlude though.
Good day,
aurell4173
...spare me. *sigh
And I realised that, my blog entries are SUPER long..!!! @.@ I've read some people's blogs, and even the most talkactive ones don't have blog entries as long as... these!
Oh, wow. That's the lightest (coz it's the shortest) entry I ever wrote. But it's just an interlude though.
Good day,
aurell4173
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Cappucino Rumba (DownPour)
There's a request for me to write something that's ..light.
Alright, alright...!! I'll try since it's my new post of the new decade! 8D
But my mood is not exactly "light" now, so how? (laugh)
Ehh.. ok. I'll write.
Since last week, I have been down from cold. @.@ Ter-ri-ble. Mmrgh.
Plus, my cca which is getting more and more... pressing. If only their music are craps, I've walked out since long.
Plus, a direct, critical hit from a tooth-surgery bill that is costing like, 3 months worth of my living allowance. The dentist said I was very "maturely calm" in taking the news. Yeah, right.. -.-
Plus, my tasks is starting to pile up, and my schedules are overlapping each other.
Plus, some other things that are ticking on my nerves. Just because I'm not saying, it doesn't mean I've lost my sensitivity. Some people should be very, very thankful that I'm a pacifist.
And.. here I am, pinned by my flu to a state of non-coherent thoughts. A state practically impossible to pound on any homework. Not that there's that many, thankfully.
School has started again, these kind of things (except the medical things) is not surprising.
Then, there's that sad news. One of my favorite teacher last year, a very kind English teacher, Ms. Low Wai Lin, has just passed away last Wednesday. She was one of the kindest teacher in my school, one that was kind enough when I was down.
It think all of her students miss her. When the news reached us, all of us cried. It was quite sudden. It was unexpected.
I was too, unsurprisingly. But these kind of things have been in my mind since long. Though unsure whether it's a good or bad thing, I was not too deep in grief. For those who believe, death is a salvation, like an absolute end of a long journey. She is a good person, I'm quite sure she will reach a nice final destination. Thinking it from that point, I'm glad if she's no longer suffering. If it's the best thing for her, I should not hold her back. Though separation is painful, though loss is hard to accept, but that's our responsibility to bear it as a being that is still living. Anyway, soon or later all things will meet again. At least, I believe so.
I pray and wish the best for her. I think, I respect her. That's all that living beings can do for her, that's one of the reason why I chose not to go to her wake beside my worsening teeth. I don't want to offend anybody, really. It's just that I don't know what others may think, but to be honest I love her too, and though I don't exaggerate to cry a lot or helping much in the gifts, my wishes and prays are sincere. That's all that are important.
...am I too cold of a person? Hmm..
I noticed that nowadays, I've gained (a little) courage to show what I like, and what I dislike. (although some people still -awesomely- assume that I'm a type of person that love only classic music, romantic blues and "candy" pop.. -.- very funny.. Just because I'm breathing deeply and sleep peacefully in transports, it doesn't always mean my music on my iPod are not having gorgeous, sometimes wild, or at times honestly dramatic bass and beats.)
I almost gave up to give the "right" appearance to my emotions. I mean my size is definitely misleading and my sense of fashion is a bit non-stereotypical. But one of my aspiration is to be someone who would like herself. One who would not curse herself, or blaming herself of her past action. One would can proudly say, "If I were someone else, and I meet this 'me', I would like that guy very much." I think such person would live a very happy and enjoyable life.
Oh, and it's different from being obsessively self-centric, just for a reminder. Coz' I dislike (yes, dislike, not hate. I don't wish to hate anybody) selfish people. So if I were to like myself, I should not be a selfish person.
Got the idea? Is it confusing? I know I'm easily misunderstood, but at least I still hope anyone who read this get the hang of it.
Have a good day,
aurell4173
Alright, alright...!! I'll try since it's my new post of the new decade! 8D
But my mood is not exactly "light" now, so how? (laugh)
Ehh.. ok. I'll write.
Since last week, I have been down from cold. @.@ Ter-ri-ble. Mmrgh.
Plus, my cca which is getting more and more... pressing. If only their music are craps, I've walked out since long.
Plus, a direct, critical hit from a tooth-surgery bill that is costing like, 3 months worth of my living allowance. The dentist said I was very "maturely calm" in taking the news. Yeah, right.. -.-
Plus, my tasks is starting to pile up, and my schedules are overlapping each other.
Plus, some other things that are ticking on my nerves. Just because I'm not saying, it doesn't mean I've lost my sensitivity. Some people should be very, very thankful that I'm a pacifist.
And.. here I am, pinned by my flu to a state of non-coherent thoughts. A state practically impossible to pound on any homework. Not that there's that many, thankfully.
School has started again, these kind of things (except the medical things) is not surprising.
Then, there's that sad news. One of my favorite teacher last year, a very kind English teacher, Ms. Low Wai Lin, has just passed away last Wednesday. She was one of the kindest teacher in my school, one that was kind enough when I was down.
It think all of her students miss her. When the news reached us, all of us cried. It was quite sudden. It was unexpected.
I was too, unsurprisingly. But these kind of things have been in my mind since long. Though unsure whether it's a good or bad thing, I was not too deep in grief. For those who believe, death is a salvation, like an absolute end of a long journey. She is a good person, I'm quite sure she will reach a nice final destination. Thinking it from that point, I'm glad if she's no longer suffering. If it's the best thing for her, I should not hold her back. Though separation is painful, though loss is hard to accept, but that's our responsibility to bear it as a being that is still living. Anyway, soon or later all things will meet again. At least, I believe so.
I pray and wish the best for her. I think, I respect her. That's all that living beings can do for her, that's one of the reason why I chose not to go to her wake beside my worsening teeth. I don't want to offend anybody, really. It's just that I don't know what others may think, but to be honest I love her too, and though I don't exaggerate to cry a lot or helping much in the gifts, my wishes and prays are sincere. That's all that are important.
...am I too cold of a person? Hmm..
I noticed that nowadays, I've gained (a little) courage to show what I like, and what I dislike. (although some people still -awesomely- assume that I'm a type of person that love only classic music, romantic blues and "candy" pop.. -.- very funny.. Just because I'm breathing deeply and sleep peacefully in transports, it doesn't always mean my music on my iPod are not having gorgeous, sometimes wild, or at times honestly dramatic bass and beats.)
I almost gave up to give the "right" appearance to my emotions. I mean my size is definitely misleading and my sense of fashion is a bit non-stereotypical. But one of my aspiration is to be someone who would like herself. One who would not curse herself, or blaming herself of her past action. One would can proudly say, "If I were someone else, and I meet this 'me', I would like that guy very much." I think such person would live a very happy and enjoyable life.
Oh, and it's different from being obsessively self-centric, just for a reminder. Coz' I dislike (yes, dislike, not hate. I don't wish to hate anybody) selfish people. So if I were to like myself, I should not be a selfish person.
Got the idea? Is it confusing? I know I'm easily misunderstood, but at least I still hope anyone who read this get the hang of it.
Have a good day,
aurell4173
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