Yes, maybe it's a terrible trait after all..

Lately, someone deducted/guessed correctly: I somehow have a short interest span. Indeed, over and over again, I am having difficulties to stay on the track I had decided. Like a little pup, I am easily distracted by the passing butterflies and such. Activities to activities, attitudes to attitudes, perceptions, too. That may explain the wide! range of experiences I had so far. The disconnectedness is disturbing, sometimes, but that is not what I want to write about now.

Perhaps it is just my not-so-healthy state. Perhaps it is just a side effect of my poor stamina I am having now. I have been having obnoxiously stagnant days for a while, and just a 5 minutes ago, I actually came out with a disturbing thought. I am losing interest in the world.

The ripples are getting boring to watch. The wind is getting somewhat easier to read. And even when I can't read them, I wonder whether it is really necessary to feel disappointed.

Yes, disappointment. Disappointment of optimism. Predictability of pessimism. And as if those were not enough, the repetitive of routines are starting to get on my nerve, again.

It may sound like secondary years all over again, but still, I believe it is better this time. At the very least, I got more companions this time. However, still..

There. I got distracted again.

Perhaps it would be easier if I can really decide on one course of action and mindset, then embark on as if it were some kind of command. Like a program, or robot. Or.. have I been doing that so far? Questions, again.

Even so, if there was one thing I want to hold on to, it would still be the promise I made.

Desperate as it seem, I still want to love this world. That is one cliche and 'cheesy' ideal concept I want to make real.

As they say, love has its ups and downs, high and low. Shifting to another perception (again), I wonder if all of this are just trivial parts of my 'romance story'..