On growing up

"A woman never run away,

A woman never hide away,

in order to survive."

Those lines were taken from a J-Pop song, Real Me. It was one of the first Japanese songs that I've ever heard, the first ones that left the pre-teen me wondering and pondering.

What does it mean to become a female? Surely it's beyond having different physical structures and abilities than males. If you're a girl in this male-dominated society, you have to gain awareness of certain things; different kind of treatments that people would give you, your biological baggages and your vulnerabilities - both physical and emotional.

Gender discrimination still exist in this society; that is a given fact. Yes, compared to the previous era, our species has relatively become more female-friendly. But to say that sexism has become extinct is a blatant lie. This topic has been discussed a lot in media and GP lessons. I think I don't have to elaborate further.

And then there are the inherent vulnerabilities that females have to bear like some destinies. We are relatively physically weaker than males, yet young females have this responsibility to protect ourselves and our virginity. Despite the increasing liberalism trend that reduce the emphasis on it, it is still something important to be defended for those who still retains their traditional values and virtues. This is more evidently relevant to those living in more conformed societies, Asian societies for example.

In my opinion, to be a woman would be to be prepared for such disadvantaging things in our life to come. I don't think all feminists are fighting for a sole selfish reason to justify wrong behaviours. Some of them, along with other 'non-feminist' females, are simply trying to survive this world.

"A woman never show her fears,

A woman never show her tears,

in order to survive."

Females are generally more sensitive to emotions. Scientific evidences aside, I guess even I can relate myself with this. At times it does bug me to see hyper-sensitive girls - those who shout hysterically at slightest movements in the dark, or those who become upset easily. But then, who am I to truly judge people one-sidedly? I am also a girl who, at times, could also suffer from a random fit of emotions and reactions, or instinctive demands for attentions.

And of course, this world isn't made from sugar houses and pixie dusts. To be a woman for me is to be strong and dependable. It's a fight, a struggle not to yield to myself.

"A woman could be dangerous,

A woman could be generous,

in order to survive."

Being a female is quite hard, really. All these constant struggles can also be related to almost every other females, I think. Modern women are guerilla fighters to some extent; we are constantly battling those internal "enemies", while at the same dealing with the ever present external pressures. I am of an opinion that this has resulted in the implantation of some form of siege mentality and in today's women's minds as the base of their competitive nature. To some extent, this makes me somewhat wary of females.. but not to the extreme of course. I understand that those attitudes females have come to adopt are somewhat a necessity at times. Well, I'm a female too, anyway.

"A woman could be having fun,

A woman could be like a nun,

in order to survive."

Flexibility. I think this is one of those life skills that can be quite handy. Call it a self-justification of my indecisive tendencies, but I believe that it is beneficial to be true to yourself. I am an individual of wide preferences, I think. I'm fine with a lot of things, from being practical to dress up 'as a girl', from adopting polite manner of speech to uttering some curses jokingly. To some extent, I think it would better equip me in this struggle also. Not only to better adapt to wider range of personalities, mind you, but also to give some choices for myself especially when I need some time out.

..in order to survive.